Don’t forget to check out the other episodes in the series. Make sure to click here to see which movies we’ve already covered - we’re sure that you’ll love what you have to say.
We’d like to thank the amazing yurricanes for working with us to create the featured image for this episode. I think you’ll agree that it’s an amazing piece of art, and you should definitely check out their work
Surprisingly, not all of them have been about Final Fantasy, too. Although, Lulu was distracted for a moment when thinking about her Hot Trash Daddy and decided that she needed a lobster bib because:
it’s easier to just fling it over the balcony then
Thoughts Going In
We didn’t really discuss our thoughts on the film before tackling it, except to say that Lulu isn’t a fan of the sequel.
Nope. Burn it.
But we did talk about our backgrounds regarding the games. Jay had played a little of the first one, the gave up; whereas Lulu and Squidge are the experts of the group, having played them all.
There were a lot of references to the video game, as the director (Christophe Gans) is on record as saying that he is a fan of the original PlayStation game and even had members of team Silent Hill on set to oversea certain aspects of the movie. As such, at points it feels like “References: The Movie”.
And, of course, Sean Bean survives the movie. Which is one heck of an achievement.
Why was he in the movie, you ask? Because the studio said
We can’t sell a movie with an all female cast
And not only is this bonkers but it’s also bonkers
double bonkers, indeed
Here’s a 10,000 ft view of the “plot”, as we see it:
Rose is running around in her sleepy clothes, because someone has gone missing
what’s her name again?
Cringe-fests and lack of chemistry between Mum and Daughter
Let’s not forget that Rose was wearing her socks to bed
Because people on IMDB are like that: they’re weird. They tag, like, "this is a film about…" and then it’s like "horror", and "multilation", and "horribleness", and "socks".
Travelling to Silent Hill in search of a script
Even more lack of chemistry
cat noises does not mean that characters have bonded
The Silent Hill of the film is based on Centralia, Pennsylvania
It’s worth reading about Centralia, as it’s fascinating.
“I’m not supposed to talk to strangers”
More chemistry between the cop and Sharon, than with Rose and Sharon
Drive-by tattoos at a cafe?
Running from the police is a bad idea
It’s the crash from intro to the video game
Ash is falling, all around me; kid’s gone missing, where’s she gone?
The fog exists, but only to be creepy
About the Fog
So the fog was included in the original game because the 3D models and environments in the original game were so detailed that the drawing distance for the game had to be very close to Harry Mason’s character model. The folks over at Team Silent (the developers of the Silent Hill games) decided to hide this by adding a fog effect. This served a dual purpose of making everything look really creepy and hiding the incredibly close drawing distance.
This was also why Harry picks up a broken radio, and uses that to know when the enemies are close by. Otherwise, the player would never know and would end up being ambushed by enemies they didn’t know were right there.
The plot is that convoluted, in the early stages, that Jay became super confused and forgot a whole section of the movie: the first time Rose walks around in the town, before being arrested. Anyway, back to the plot…
Press X to Sharron
Store fonts are references to the game
Let’s play Silent Hill (1999)
Jay and Lulu re-write the movie
this wasn’t in the movie, but they did a great job of doing it in less than 30 seconds
Lulu mentions something when talking about symbolism:
There’s a lot of deep rooted symbolism in the Silent Hill games. And I think, as a game series, I’d honestly love to do a chat like this with you guys about the Silent Hill series; because so much symbolism
Watch this space, folks. We’re in the process of arranging something with some special guests.
Meanwhile Rose is busy dropping her lighter and jacket
Fus ro dah! and Jonny Cash
Boromir Sharpe tries to get some information out of a mechanic
Cybil leaps into action, but not before taking her jacket off
Squelchy things abound
Rose takes a bus without taking a bus
Meanwhile at the school, Rose finds a torch
Lulu would be terrible in a zombie apocalypse
again, this isn’t in the movie. But it was an important point to raise
Rose might have farted, but she finds a desk with “witch” written on it"
A CLUE: Alessa Gillespie
Rose goes to the bathroom
I double dare you
No jump scare when everyone expected one
Stuff goes South, when Rose locks people out of the toilet
Clive comes to life
Rose blinds herself with her own torch, then tries a spot of stunt work
RUN AWAY from Pyramid Head
The inclusion of Pyramid Head in this movie is, at first, very confusing.
Pyramid Head represents the frustrations
of a rather underpants related nature
of James Sutherland (hero of Silent Hill 2) has due to his having to deal with the very slow death of his wife whilst being surrounded by
ed: we hated putting these next two words in the article, but it’s what Team Silent have said
“sexy nurses” and not getting any … underpants related attention.
Because of that, Pyramid Head’s appearance in the movie doesn’t make sense… until you’ve seen the movie through to the end and realise that he was there to protect Alessa. He only ever appears when Alessa is in danger for characters other than Rose. And that’s something which has been backed up by Christophe Gans
the director of the movie
The more you know, I guess
Rose sings into her torch, and Cybil goes all McGuyver
Pyramid Head attacks, again
Lulu’s little theory holds water
but only AFTER you’ve seen the movie
Cybil freaks out
Boromir Sharpe makes it to Silent Hill
Anna is in a cult
Boromir breaks in and uncovers a CLUE!
Rose destroys some art looking for room 111
Rose is busy dropping her stolen knife
Rose of the Jungle
My arms are on fire
Not Pigeon-Man; he demands bread
Anna has eyes, and everyone runs to the church
They are the international hide and seek champions